Gettin' handy and gettin' sandy.

This weekend I am starting my first big home project: refinishing the hardwood floors.  I can't wait to put on those awesome see-through goggles and a guard mask.  Hot, right?

My realtor recommended a sander and he says it works so well that he actually tried to mess the floors up at one point just to see if it was possible.  He even went against the grain and it didn't leave a noticeable mistake on the floor, so I SHOULD be good. 

I think I've always had a little bit of a fear of large hardware machines, especially when I'm the one in charge of their movement.  My dad is a lawyer, and I grew up hearing about people accidently cutting their body parts off, or running over their feet, or falling on top of something sharp.  I think there was even one guy who accidently shaved part of the skin of his own arm off when he was skin shaving a pig in the slaughterhouse.  Eww.  I probably shouldn't have told you that.

I don't really know how I could injure myself, but I always have some sort of fear in the back of my mind that something will happen.  I'm going to be wearing shoes, so it's not like I'm going to sand down the surface of my foot or anything.  And I don't think it's possible to fall face first into the moving surface of a running sander machine.... but you never know.  There's a first for everything!

It reminds me of the Darwin Awards.  Ever heard of those?  Their catch phrase is: "Honoring those who improve the species... by accidently removing themselves from it!"  As tragic as it sounds, a Darwin Award is given to someone who dies in a situation that is linked to their absent-mindedness or stupidity.  For example, here's one from the website:

(11 March 1978, France) The singer Claude Francois, whose stellar career can be compared to that of Elvis Presley, popularized rock and roll music in France. One evening, he returned to his Paris apartment from a busy touring schedule, and ran a bath. While standing in the filled tub, he noticed a light bulb that wasn't straight, tried to straighten it... and was electrocuted.

Or this one, for instance:

(27 October 2009, Arkansas) Thirty-year-old Devan LeAnn of Shongaloo, Louisiana, was visiting Lake Ehrling with a male friend. Recent bouts of heavy rain had resulted in a flood of runoff water, and they decided it would be fun to take a mattress careening down the surging water in the spillway.

Unfortunately Leann was riding a foam egg-crate style mattress pad. Imagine a wet foam pad. Are you sinking yet? According to her friend, Devan LeAnn simply vanished from sight at dusk. The next morning her body was found in a tangle of trees 70 yards below the spillway.

Parents, warn your children! Wetting the bed can be deadly. 

I think I also read one where a man thought "Cruise Control" meant his RV would drive itself and he could go in the back and cook some breakfast.  I'm sure it didn't take him long to figure out that mistake.

Anyhoo, wish me luck on the project.  It will be a lot of work, but ultimately it's a reward, as long as I look as cool as this guy while I'm doing it:

Peace,

Kelly